This carrd is meant to go over 'fictive' (and other fiction aligned folks) etiquette. What to do, how to act, and what is generally considered good manners.What's a fictive?
A fictive is a member that belongs to a system and who has a fictional source. For the purposes of this document, we will be using fictive to encompass the experience of being a member of a system that stems from a 'fictional source'. This could include people who identify with identities (such as fictionfolk, otherkin, IRLs/delusional attachments, or endels. However, we'll mostly just be using the word fictive.Why should I care about etiquette for this?
Because we're all our own people and just want to be treated as such. You'd think people know how to behave, but we've had/seen some mind-bogglingly inappropriate behavior from people, including nonfictives and other fictives alike!Select a button below to read more for a more in-depth view.
Last updated 11/15/2025
Made by Sprites ☀️
This page will go over some common scenarios we often see play out and how you should conduct yourself around fictives generally speaking. We can't account for every single possible outcome, but we wanted to cover our general bases. If you run into a situation we don't cover here, just be polite and use common sense; you should be fine!---1. Don't be a dickThis is pretty self explanatory, but it's also polite to just do this anyways! Be kind to people and treat them the way that you'd like to be treated. Don't judge people as their source self or even what their source is. If you run into a fictive of a villain, you don't get to be an asshole - that makes you the true villain instead! This slides nicely into point number 2---2. Treat fictives' source the same way the fictive wants to interact with their source. And remember: don't judge or compare people to a sourceThis rule is worded weirdly to say that you should really follow the fictive's lead on how you talk to them about themself and their source. Some people don't want to acknowledge their source at all, some people encourage source talk and engage in fandom. Follow their pace and be respectful when you talk about source related things.If you recognize a fictive's source, you do not have to point it out, but you generally should be okay to comment or converse with the additional context of their source. Knowledge of someone's source does not equal knowing who the person you're talking to is now, think of it more like baby pictures or a blue print rather than the whole of your fictive friend's identity.Don't: "OMG I am your biggest fan, I love when you slayed the dragon and rescued the princess! Do you still have that really embarrassing mole that was revealed in season 7?"Do: "Oh hey! Yeah, I know your source so I get that comment, I would want to go to the dermatologist too!"(This example sucks, hopefully you can see there's just a certain chillness you should bring to the conversation. We're all just people chatting and experiencing this thing together.)Just because you know their source does not mean you know them---3. Don't assume familiarity with fictives
just because you're familiar with their source_What this means is, just because you know the source material or the source character does not give you a pass to treat them in a familiar fashion. It is best to greet them as you would any other stranger and go from there. If you are a fictive who shares a source with another fictive, do not assume familiarity just because you share a source. That means if you had some kind of relationship or connection, do not immediately start flirting, teasing, or any other kind of overly familiar/intimate with someone who is the equivalent of a stranger with a familiar face to you. It may be hard because people seem the same and it can be exciting to talk to someone you know, but just ask nicely if they want to talk (to you or about source) and respect their boundaries.Yes: Fictive A: "Hey, I just noticed we shared a source and I'd love to talk with you sometime. I miss home and would love to chat with someone who gets it"Fictive B: "Oh sure, I like talking with source mates, please just don't talk about [source related trauma]"(Also respect if someone says no they don't want to talk. They don't owe you that - it's okay to be bummed but nobody owes you themselves if they aren't interested. Best to find people who are!)No: Fictive A: "Hi, how's everybody doing today?"Fictive B: "Oh, my dear, my darling, I have missed you so much, please kiss me dear."(This is a dramatic example, but we have seen variations of this kind of interaction throughout the years. If you do share a source and recognize someone, feel free to say hi, just remember they are their own person.)---4. Be mindful of your language while in plural spaces, but especially fictive spacesYou never know who is reading your posts, who could be a fictive of someone you hate or want to bitch about. It's not good form to bash characters or sources at all, especially in fictive focused spaces. Even if you have complicated feelings for some reason (attachment to source, strong opinions, memories of people), do not take it out on a person you do not know but share a source with/recognize their source. It is your job to manage your emotions and step away as needed or to disengage. And on that note:---5. Treat all fictives the same, even villain fictives or fictives from "problematic" sources.People don't choose where they come from or who they are. Don't be rude or weird to villain fictives or those from "problematic" sources just for existing. If you don't want to see the big bad from your source, that's fine and you aren't obligated to engage - but you are not allowed to push them out of spaces. Be respectful and open, most people just want to hang out and participate in spaces as they are now. This doesn't mean you can go up to them and blame them for being the big bad or doing any other actions as dictated by source, this is something for you to deal with on your own and in your own time.---6. Regarding doubles, it is up to you to be okay or remove yourself as needed.Doubles refers to there being two (or more) fictives of the same source character. Some people feel positively about doubles, some people feel neutral, while other may feel negatively. Those in the negative range could feel this way for personal biases or even issues with disrupting their perception of reality. If you are uncomfortable being around doubles, it is 100% your job to manage your spaces and access to chat - it is not the job of the double to cater to your comfort. It is generally polite in system or fictive spaces to not talk negatively about doubles with or without knowing if a double exists within the server. Seeing yourself can always be weird, I think it's fine to acknowledge the weirdness, but leave all hostility or negativity at the door.
This page will go over some FAQs regarding fictive etiquette and related topics.
I'm a singlet and I'm trying to support my system friends who have fictives. What do I do?By taking the time to read this and by taking that kind of consideration into your hands, it sounds like you're making the right steps! At the end of the day, this person is just part of a system that is your friend. Treat them how they want to be treated at their own pace - usually with friends you can just treat everyone in a friendly manner and wait for them to take the lead if they want something different. Good luck and thanks for being a good friend.---I'm a member of a system/a fictive myself, why should I need this document?We hope this document will be a good thing to help people navigate these social situations, and we think it's important for everyone to consider this before interacting with fictive. We have seen nonfictives and fictives alike slip up and act inappropriately, so everyone could use a refresher just in case.---What if someone wants to be treated like their source enthusiastically? Do I still treat them like I don't know them?If someone wants to be treated as their source and for your to interact with them that way, then I'd say it's fine to do that! They have set the pace how they want and laid out how they would like to be interacted with. Just be sure to go forward with a sincere interest in building a friendship based in communication and trust.---I'm a singlet/a fictive who sees other fictives I recognize in common spaces. How should I react?For singlet fans recognizing a fictive, don't treat it like a celebrity meet and greet, or a chance to roleplay. They are people just living their life and existing! Treat them normally. For fictives who recognize other fictives you may be sourcemates with, just be cool as well. Take it slow, feel free to say hi and ask what they're comfortable with. If you both agree you want to talk, that's fabulous! There should be a basis of mutual respect, understanding, and trust for everyone involved. Know that you are growing a relationship together here in the now - be wary of those who immediately try to sway you with "I remember you from my memories and you were exactly like this" and similar tactics, which can often lead to uncomfortable situations at best and bad relationships at worst.
This page will go over some common terminology used throughout this carrd.
+ Fictive: headmates based on a fictional source.+ System: the collection of people and entities, often called headmates, that share a single physical plural body.+ Source: a source refers to some material that a headmate came from.+ Sourcemate: a term for when two or more fictionkin, introjects, or others with a fiction-based identity share the same source material.+ Doubles: a headmate that shares an identity with another headmate.+ Singlet: a person who isn't plural, or in other words doesn't share their body with anyone else.
This page will share some other common resources in regards to plurality and the plural community.+ More Than One: This website is a beautiful packet of information that is considered a 101 to plurality. Note they also have a page on generalized etiquette here.+ Pluralpedia: This is a community based encyclopedia about all things plurality and is very handy if you want information or definitions of several system based terms.+ Plural Hub: As the currently largest existing gateway to the wider plural community, they work with people to aggregate links to various resources and communities. Their mission is to help connect people and provide easy access to learning more about and connecting with the different facets of multiplicity.+ Plural Etiquette Questionnaire: This is something for plurals to fill out to let others (especially non-plurals) know how best to interact with them, and to establish some understandings about communication. It is best done on a system by system or even individual by individual scale. Written by Hungry Ghosts.+ Fictive Etiquette Pastebin: A pastebin made by The Salt Institute that can be copied and modified to your specifications. Salts are a fictive heavy system and this layout is very well done.+ Plural Rules of Engagement: Getting to know a plural system can mean unlearning certain social habits and picking up new ones. They understand that it can be difficult to get used to, so they’ve written this guide for newbies. They can’t pretend to speak for other groups, but this is what works for their system. Your mileage may vary, based on your own experience and comfort level – we expect that other medium-sized, highly individualised systems will benefit the most from this article.+ OMG I LOVE That Character!: Or How Fictives Want To Be Treated: This is a personal blog post from Starfall Haven's Minato regarding what it means to be a fictive (to them) as well as some general etiquette. Included because this is a good piece to consider, especially for non fictives, when interacting with fictives generally.+
Fictionkin, Fictive, and Fableing Etiquette - Respecting Fiction-based Identities: This is a video essay done by Daydream System for Othercon regarding how to respect fiction-based identities. A good video to have on hand that explores this topic.+ Miraheze LGBTQIA+ Wiki blog post regarding fictives and “dos and donts": This was a post I found while researching if there was an etiquette guide for fictives specifically. I enjoyed the post and wanted to share it here as I think it makes good points.+ Quicksilver System's Fictive Etiquette blog post: This is another blog post done by the Quicksilver System that lays out general good etiquette tips to practice when you're interacting with fictives.